You know what sucks about jokes? They are almost never funny. In fact, you can scratch the almost. Jokes are never funny.
The most unfunny people are always telling the jokes. That guy you work with with the dumb hair. The drunk guy at the bar with weird teeth. Your boss. Your dad.
Usually, if someone says, “Wanna hear a joke,” in my head I think, “Nope,” but I always say, “Sure.” I’m always sorry I did.
Wanna hear a joke? How many hippopotamus does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
This weekend, here’s what I’d do. After work today, hit the liquor store, ice down the cooler, and find a pool somewhere. Take a drink. Take a dip. Repeat.
Now that you’re relaxed, check out some tunes. You could patio chill at Smilin’ Jacks and check out the Smithstonians.
Or you could head to the Smoke and Barrel and check out The Pope County Bootleggers.
It’s summertime, and that means that on Saturday morning, you should head to the Farmers’ Market.
Saturday afternoon, Wingfest is going down at the Northwest Arkansas Mall.
And if you’ve never seen Fayetteville’s Vore (Where’ve you been. These guys have been around forever) you can quit screwing around and check them out at the Gypsy on College with Vessels Of Wrath and Auger.
Sunday is a little more awesome than normal this week. First, you can check out the Sunday Farmers Market at the Botanical Gardens.
Then, you could head over to the Unitarian Universalist church for the kick off of Pride Week festivities.
Have you been to any of the shows at the Fayetteville Public Library? Sunday is a good time to check one out, with one of our favorite Fayetteville bands 3 Penny Acre playing on the patio.
Finally on Sunday night, the Firefly Festival will be happening at the Botanical Gardens with live music by David’s Pegasus, Mountain Sprout, Hosta, Devil’s Promenade, and Justches, and an appearance by the recently-crazy-famous Swamp Kirin from Seabat Studio’s.
Oh, and send your Dad a card. It’s Father’s Day.
That’s a lot of stuff. The full list is below, and feel free to add to the list in the comments. What are you guys doing this weekend?
Friday June 19
Arsaga’s on Crossover: Melody & Morty
Arsaga’s on Gregg: Alina Clark
Boom Boom Room: Jessie Dean
George’s: LaFuSo, FOS Projec, Boom Kinetic, Emily Cole Band, No Name Kicker, Use Curtis
Gusano’s Pizza: Darren Ray
Gypsy on College: Signum AD, Black Leaf Clover and Wasting Days
Jammin’ Java: Mike & Maliah
The New Deli: Kamikaze Slut, Ginsu Wives, David’s Pegasus
Smiling Jack’s Fresh Foods: The Smithstonians
Smoke & Barrel: Pope County Bootleggers
Teatro Scarpino: DJ Adam
Saturday June 20
Arsaga’s on Crossover: Chad Sisco
Arsaga’s on Gregg: Brian Ellis
Boom Boom Room: Five by Five
Fayetteville Athletic Club: Tri-Sport Club Kid’s Triathlon – 8am
Fayetteville Farmers’ Market: On the square (7am-2pm)
George’s: Control Alt Delete, Where’s Lawrence?, Standing for Something, Pretty Boy Convoy
GoodFolk: Tiffany Christopher
Grub’s: Wes Hart Band
Gypsy on College: Vessels Of Wrath, Auger, Vore
Jammin’ Java: Reese Neal
NWA Mall: Wingfest
Smiling Jack’s Fresh Foods: Rachel Fields (Noon-3pm) + Guta (6-9pm)
Smoke & Barrel: The Villains
Sunday June 21
Botanical Garden of the Ozarks: Firefly Festival – 6pm
Common Grounds: Cherry & Cal, DJ SoulFree
Fayetteville Farmers’ Market: At Botanical Gardens (9am-1pm)
Fayetteville Public Library: 3 Penny Acre – 2pm
George’s: Mountain Sprout (No cover)
Jose’s: Sarah Hughes
Nightbird Books: Howl – Women’s Open Mic – 6:30pm
Pesto Cafe: Shannon Wurst
Smiling Jack’s Fresh Foods: Teddy Sablon (Noon-3pm)
Unitarian Universalist: NWA PRIDE WEEK “Celebrating Our Diversity,” Annual Pride Service & Luncheon – 11am